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things I recommend, OH-IO style

Black labs, or a black lab named Kirby

Functional air-conditioning: word.

Anything at Panera, especially their Chocolate Duet with Walnuts cookie and Strawberry, Blueberry and Chicken Salad

Buying Local: Walmart can eat my shorts

The Simpsons: movie and tv show on dvd

Backyard gardens

Backyard BBQ's...mmm, ribs

Joey Fratello's Pizzaria in Findlay, especially their Rosemary pizza

Listening to MPR via iTunes

Roadtrips to Ann Arbor

Harry Potter

Friends who call

Friends who write notes and comments

Facebook (friend me!)

Buck-Eye Ice Cream from Dietsch's

Little Hugo's Lemon Slush

Little Hugo's anything

Colin's folks

Ben Gillig

Doing nothing but being

Neighbors who save the day

2nd Cheapest gas prices in the nation

Reading outside on adirondak chairs while the sun sets

Playing catch

Learning how to throw some disc

Bowling Green

Watching 5 seasons of Scrubs and relating far too well

Cedar Point

Cleve-Land!

Snuggling next to someone I love, while we still can

Harry Potter + Ann Arbor = Awesomeness

Last weekend I picke dup a copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, read it, and took a day trip to Ann Arbor. It quite possibly was one of my favorite weekends of the summer. Colin was off in Vegas, learning more about his new internship congregation and getting to know the great people there, and I was in Tiffin with my new best friend, Kirby, and Colin's high school best friend, Mr. Gillig. Ben and I stood in line to get our copy of the book, went to get milkshakes at McDonalds, and sat for a cople of hours reading. I pooped out after a couple of hours, but Ben managed to stay up and read, and read, and read.

The next day came too early as I found myself rushing out the door in order to meet my friends Emily and Jim in Ann Arbor by 11 a.m. Emily & Jim are in my small group for CPE. Have I mentioned that my small group is great?! Jim and I butt heads a lot, but there is a lot of respect on both ends. Emily and I are like sisters from another mister, and though we do not look a like (as Natalie and I do) we have a very simillar trajectory in life. She goes to PLTS, Luther's partner school in the Western Mission Cluster. Anyway, we gt together to grab Indian food and to attend the Ann Arbor Art Fair. It is the largest in the country, I believe.

Some highlights:

(l-r) Steven Daniel, Audrey Heller, Marie Gruber

Though the fair offered much more than photographs, it was mostly photographs that caught my eye. I am really excited to take some photos next year on internship!

Later, I made my way to Zingerman's Deli, where I picked up some challa bread, kalamata olives and gorgonzola cheese. It was hectic; full of people and full of life! It is a must see, eat, experience in Ann Arbor.

I also made my way to Trader Joe's!

After all of this I even managed to see an old friend, Stephanie. I haven't seen her since we were in Freiburg together. She is pictured here, the one on the left, laughing.

On my way back from Ann Arbor I received a text message from Ben: what page are you on...I'm finished. He read the book in less than one full day! He won that round! It took me another day and a half to finish.

I've never had as much fun reading as I have with the Harry Potter series. I think I might start over from the beginning. Nothing has captured my imagination and focus more than this series. I don't want to spoil it for anyone who has not yet read the book, but I do want to say that I heart Neville Longbottom!

I have to say that I wasn't expecting a lot out of a weekend in which Colin was gone and I was left to Tiffin Ohio all by my lonesome, but with the help of a few friends, a great dog, and an incredible story, I did get by!

Three weeks to go before heading back to Minnesota and about four weeks until internship. It's hard not to look ahead, but here's to enjoying today!

Seasonal Feasting :: A Wedding, A Funeral

For everything there is a season and a time for every matter under heaven.

My friends Erin & Mitch were married today, Friday the 13th, a day that black cats and broken mirrors cannot touch superstitiuosly. But this particular Friday the 13th holds particular significance; Erin's grandparents were married 50 years prior on that same Friday the 13th. What a celebration: a new marriage, a golden anniversary!

I am sad that I couldn't be there. Being in Ohio doesn't afford for that. Nevertheless, through pictures and conversations with friends in attendance, the day was as beautiful as the bride.

Friday the 13th for me involved a funeral.

Last Sunday, one day after the flood, one day after musing about the ubiquitous page, call, tolling bell that seems to surround Colin's internship and my experience thereof, I received my first page, my first call. The bell was tolling for one of my patients.

The call came when I was as scrubby looking, hungry and active as possible. I was surprised to hear the phone ring, it never had before. In the car on my way to the grocery store, I fumbled toward my holster, flipped it open and sheepishly said, "This is Jeni." It was the nurse on call who asked if I could assist with a patient who was actively dying. A decision needed to be made and the family needed help in making it. I arrived 45 minutes later, cleaner, better looking, but still hungry for lunch. One hour and thirty minutes later, the patient breathed his last, surrounded by some family and one awkward yet calm chaplain.

They say you never forget your last death. I wonder if that is true. I guess time will tell.

I attended the funeral on Friday, a great service and a surprisingly good eulogy. The text was from Ecclesiastes 3, the same text used at my grandfather's funeral. The preacher talked about the different seasons in this man's life; a person's life is made up of seasons and seasons change. Nevertheless, God's promises don't change. God gives us our seasons, God is with us in our seasons, God brings us through our seasons, especially the season of death, and gives us life.

I find it pleasing to have had a funeral on this Friday the 13th, this same day as my friends' wedding, this same day as the 50th wedding anniversary, for these seasonal feastings are enveloped in God's great love which calls us all to the great feast, now and forever. While our seasons may be different, our lives woven at different times, at different places and with different materials, the promise remains: in Christ Jesus, God is with and for us and nothing can separate us from that.

the flood

Thank God for geraniums. Geraniums.

I had a plan for the weekend. A plan to see Colin on Saturday morning, to have breakfast with him before he started his shift, to go to Columbus and do some shopping, specifically at Trader Joes. I had a plan.

Saturday morning, in a hurry to get to Lima to see Colin before his shift started, I hustled from his house, where I am taking care of his dog while he is away for the weekend, to go to the Baker's house, where I house sit while they are in China. The Bakers left on Friday morning. Peg asked me to water her geraniums every day: two glasses for the geranium and one glass for the fern. I was already running late for Lima, and a trip over to the Bakers would add 20+ minutes to my trek, but deontology, what can you do?

I open the door, and, water. Water everywhere. Water all over the floor, water running through the vents, water dropping through the floor to the basement. Water. And there I was in my cute little dress. A damsel.

I tried to turn the water off, I tried to contain the water, but, like anyone who sees a mouse, I was on high ground, out of the water. I called for reinforcements.

Thankfully with the Bakers, the reinforcements include The National Center for Water Quality.

Within minutes, I was flooded with help. Ellen called and Nancy and her crew were over to shut off the water, dry up the mess and provide this distressed damsel with calm. Thanks be to God for such good neighbors.

I also called the plumber. He found the culprit: a quarter inch piece of plastic tube that up and cracked, bursting and flooding and ruining any chance for me to go to Lima any time soon. He'll come back on Tuesday to finish the job.

I did manage to water the geraniums. And because I came to water the geraniums and happened upon the flood at that moment, the water stayed off of the Baker's beautiful new hardwood floor. Thank God for geraniums.

And as for Lima, I made it eventually, just in time for Colin to be paged. Sigh.

We're getting used to responsibility. This call, this job, this life...Life seems to hang on the mercy of others, ebbing and flowing in rhythm with jarring pager beeps. I hate that beep. But that beep is me too.

That beep for me was to break my plans in order to stop a flood.

All in all the day wasn't half bad. I called up Colin's high school buddy Ben and went out to lunch at the Clover Club. Ben's pretty cool. He mostly likes good music, especially alt country. I love alt country. I heart Ryan Adams.

Kirb and I were also able to spend most of the day together. I know he likes that. He misses people when they're not around. He pouts when we go away. We napped and watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I always cry when Cedric is killed by Wormtail's Avada Kedrava spell. So sad.

In Lima, when Colin was paged, I went shopping. I became that guy.

We ended up getting a late dinner at Milano Cafe, our second favorite restuarant in Lima. And instead of catching a movie or bowling, we got a call from our great buddy Jesse, who is in Denver for the summer for CPE.

So much for plans, life happens anyway.

Toledo Museum of Art, The

CPE Group today comprised of a visit to the Toledo Museum of Art. Didactic was presented through art.

We sat in front of The Architect's Dream by Thomas Cole, The Adoration of the Child by Piero di Cosimo; we shared about what we saw and what we thought was going on in the painting.

The museum was surprisingly well-stocked; it had its share of the greats and some of my faves: Rothko, Van Gogh, Monet, Renoir, Cranach (nerd!), Rembrandt, Modigliani, Picasso et al, et al.

There were two exhibits that we took in, the first was Speaking Out, the art of Elizabeth Catlett.
The exhibit offered pieces sculptured, printed and drawn; a wide variety that ran the gamut from political action to the love of a mother.

Next we saw "Dream American;" an exhibit on Andy Warhol. I've taken in a few AW exhibits, and the things that always strikes me is his parallel use of death and the cult of celebrity. In Warhol's words, "The more you look at the same exact thing, the more the meaning goes away, and the better and emptier you feel." Warhol's multiple images of the celebrity offers familiarity in place of a sense of the strange. Likewise with death. Images of death and those who have died, plastered over and over again creates familiarity rather than strangeness.

Underscoring these two poles is American consumerism. About those Campbell soup cans, it was written, "[Warhol] considered consumerism the bedrock of American Culture and felt tthat art should reflect the priorities of the culture back to itself." To this Warhol adds, "Buying is more American than thinking and I'm as American as they come."

The best Warhol quote of the day: "I am a superficially deep person."

A good day. Back to the grind tomorrow.

Cheers.

Two are better than one

My new BFF is a Canadian Black Lab named Kirby. I'd call this a shout out, since praise and props in e-form are regaled as shout-outs. But alas, dogs can't read, or respond for that matter. Nevertheless, here is my tribute to a dog.

Dogs are funny things. Highly emotional and sensitive characters, they are quick to forget how much doting attention you give them if you take too long to let them out the last time or if you didn't quite fill up their food dish or dump in cool enough water at their appropriate feeding times. And yet dogs are the first to welcome you, the last to see you go, and generally a constant companion. Kirby is so relentless in his companionship that he actually camps outside the bathroom door when I decide I need a shower or 5 minutes of respite from the aforementioned dog.

We could all use a few dogs. Or perhaps a few dog-like people. No, not people who will drool all over your car windows or snore next to your bed when you desperately try to rest. No, people who are loyal, present and concerned for your well-being. It's common practice for nursing homes to have such pets, and, if they must, fluffy-tailed cats, who, I might add, are nowhere near as loving as short-hair tailed dogs. Nursing homes do this because people don't.

Of course today I met a family who, among the siblings, meticulously care for their mother in one nursing home and their father in another nursing home that is an egregious amount of miles away. They do this as if it was nothing. They are not the only ones.

But, of course, there are people who are neglected by family and friends who have left to live their own lives. Last week I visited a woman who was all alone; a woman whose only personal note in her file read something like, "do not call if her medicines change, do not call if her status changes. Only call if she actually dies." Sad. The woman was agitated and alone and I was asked to pray for her life to end. A scary thing, no?

We've talked about this in class before: when to pray like hell for healing and when to pray like hell for heaven to finally come. I'm told I'll get a feeling for this, but as a green chaplain, I was more than happy to receive such direction.

Generally when I pray, I pray for comfort, peace, joy and love.  For patients to be comforted, to feel the least amount of pain possible. I pray for peace, peace between family members, peace for the patient, and peace for their loved ones after the patient dies. Joy, I pray for joy; I'm not sure whose joy, the patient's or mine.  I pray for love, that it may abound for all.  I don't typically pray for healing.  In Hospice care the prognosis is usually death.  But praying for death to finally come.  Eish.

My prayer was fulfilled. 

Such prayers are filled by the multitude these days, though my only action around these deaths are to cross names from my list.  In fact, all whom I have reflected upon in my blog have now died. Nevertheless, Colin sees far more death than I.  We are both surprised. Such a reality makes us both glad to have one another and my new BFF Kirby, the smiling face at the end of the day, the constant request to receive attention, and the wagging tale that tells me I am loved. Two are better than one...a three-cord strand cannot be broken (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

Do take care and love one another. Peace.

Photo compliment of Blake Grangaard

hands, Ohio and life these days

I need a manicure like whoa. At this point, I'd settle for finding my nail clippers. They're somewhere amidst my exploding baggage, in one of the two places in which I am living for the summer. I stay with the Bakers during the week and, when Colin is on call in Lima for the weekend, I stay at his folks' house and hang out with a co-dependent but loving black lab named Kirby (as in Kirby Puckett!). Tiffin is a good place to be.

Findlay is also a good place to be. I am a hospice chaplain there. On my first day, I held a dying woman's hand. It was soft and well cared for. My supervisor tells me that she must have good care because that doesn't happen naturally. Her nails were even well manicured. Pink, nicely-shaped and shiny. I extended my hand to hers to greet her, to tell her who I was. I hunched down, kneeling in mid-air, in order not to hover above her. There I stayed. We held hands; hers looked to be in better shape than mine.

I can count the number of times I've closed my eyes while praying at Seminary on one hand; praying with the dying is a much holier place than I am used to, I think I will be closing my eyes a lot this summer. We pray with almost every patient that we see, unless they do not wish to have prayer. It's a holy place, to live amongst the dying and walk with them on this journey.

I was asked to lead prayer for the first time about a week ago. We walked into a woman's room, a woman who was "pleasantly confused." "Pleasantly confused" is a nice way to say "mentally gone." We sit and read with those who are pleasantly confused, we hold their hands, they hold ours. This particular "pleasantly confused" woman held my hand and would not let go, so there I stayed. At the end of our time, my supervisor asked me to pray. I prayed in thanks for the sunshine that streaks through the window, lighting up our lives. I prayed in thanks for the day, for the present time. I prayed for anything I thought of. It was hard to leave, especially as she asked us not to go. She became agitated, but we had to go. We visited our next patient and when we finished and walked past pleasantly confused, she was peacefully asleep.

Along with my Monday, Wednesday and Friday responsibilities in Findlay, I am in Toledo on Teusdays and Thursdays for our group meetings. On Tuesday, our small groups meet, mine in Toledo and Colin's in Bowling Green. On Thursday, our small groups meet as on group in Toledo. Holy Toledo! All of this travelling has created a third living space for me this summer: my car, which has decided against air conditioning as a way of life, much to my chagrin.

Anyway, life is good here in Ohio. I am getting used to it, but it is lonely to be far from home and far from loved ones, both family and friends. Do take care.

OH-IO

We've arrived.  It's glorious.